BUT NEVER FOR LUNCH – SANDRA ARAGONA

 

Further exploits of an undiplomatic Beagle now in retirement with her owners and not even Trying to Behave. Whilst our former Ambassador endeavours to maintain his standards of sartorial elegance and diplomatic sensitivity, Madame revels in the liberty to refuse a luncheon invitation, ditch the high heels and head for the countryside. Beagle of course never really tried to behave in the first place, but released from the constraints of Embassy protocol, she indulges in her own vision of heaven, be it exercising young racehorses, chasing cats up trees or simply peeing on the roses.

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Beagle: “Beagle and I had a serious talk the other day.   Look, I said. I am prepared to take you horse riding with me on two conditions. She rolled over in the approved “Save me, I’m only an innocent Beagle” position.  One, I said sternly, you stay right away from the muck heap and two, you do not eat anything at all, neither alive nor dead nor pre-digested.

Got it?                                                                                                       

Got it, she said, and made straight for the front door. Deaf as a post but understands every word you say.” 

Travelling in India: “You have to respect a camel.

Anything which can look so damn supercilious and make you feel so damned inferior whilst looking down at you from the top end of an S-bend has to be admired for its sheer aplomb.” 

Grandchildren: “I suggested we might all go to the Zoo. Grandfather, (His former Excellency), set the tone by getting lost before we were even through the turnstile. He finally caught up with us after I had put out a lost child announcement and requested that he should make his way to the restaurant where his mummy would be waiting for him. He was not at all amused.”